Posted by: didyouseethis | March 10, 2011

Amusing….or not

Capitalism: You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull.

PURE Democracy: You have two cows. Your neighbors decide who gets the milk.


The New Deal
: You have two cows. The Government regulates what you can feed them and when you can milk them. Then it pays you not to milk them. Eventually it takes both, shoots one, milks the other and pours the milk down the drain. Then it requires you to fill out forms accounting for the missing cows.

The Great Society: You have two cows. The Government decides the milk will be given for free to others they deem to be “in need.” You realize that you too could get free milk if you stopped working… so you do and allow the Government to deem you “in need.”

Feudalism: You have two cows. Your lord takes some of the milk and orders you to war.

Socialism: You have two cows. You put your cows in a barn with everyone else’s cows and everyone takes care of all the cows. The milk is divided up equally. When some want more milk because they are “more equal…” The Government determins it is best that the cows be cared for by ex-chicken farmers. You, in turn, have to take care of the chickens the government took from the chicken farmers. The government gives you as much milk and eggs that the regulations say you should need.

Fascism: You have two cows. The government takes ownership of both. They make you care for them at your own time and expense then they sell you the milk. One day they show up and shoot you in the head.

Communism: You have two cows. You share them your neighbors. You and your neighbors bicker about who has the most “ability” and who has the most “need”. Eventually less work is doens, no one gets any milk, and the cows die of starvation.

Totalitarianism: You have two cows. The government takes them and denies they ever existed. Milk is banned. You are shot in the head.

Enviromentalism: You have two cows. The government bans you from milking or killing them.

Political Correctness: You are “associated with” two differntly-aged, bovines of non-specific gender nor color. The concept of “ownership” is a symbol of the phallo-centric, war mongering, intolerant past.

Surrealism: You have two giraffes. The government mandates that you to take harmonica lessons

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